Tuesday, May 30, 2006

Happy Birthday, Beautiful

DSC03722

When I was pregnant with my first born, I was so excited; I couldn’t wait to become a mother. I couldn’t wait to meet this person who would become my first daughter and see what would become of us and our relationship. We went to the hospital after my husband and I had eagerly prepared with classes and books to know exactly how to go through labor and delivery naturally and successfully. After my ever present and sensitive husband helped me with my breathing, my imagery, the pressure points in my feet, ice chips in placed gingerly in my mouth and wet, cool rags on my forehead; after holding my hands as I pushed and screamed loud enough for the whole maternity ward to hear that a baby was about to be born, they plopped her immediately on my belly, and I saw this beautiful baby…who didn’t look anything like I imagined she would look. I thought, Oh, she looks huge, and they put her on the scale and said, She weighs 5 pounds, 15 ounces. After attempting to feed her, I called in the nurses who readily gave me advice on nursing. When they sent us on our way, three instead of two, I suddenly realized that so far, nothing had gone as I had planned, and here they are, sending me away to take care of her all alone. What if I do this all wrong?

Seven years later, I’m still trying to understand her. She’s taught me a lot about myself, life, love, forgiveness, humility, understanding, empathy, and made me into a better person. How is it that I planned on having a child to mold and mostly it is me who is being molded by my child?
collage2

I love you, sweet one. I will always be here to love and protect you and learn from you.

2 comments:

Lucky Candice said...

She's so cute and I can't beleive her birthday already came and she's 7. I love the part about learning from them - isn't that true.

You're an awesome mom - keep up the good work!

LC

Anonymous said...

Nice colors. Keep up the good work. thnx!
»